it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
My dad just asked Siri to "help me find my daughters dignity."
If you were my daughter, I'd do the same thing.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
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