I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
Randomize
