"Ever since I killed her kid she be actin' shady." Actual quote overheard at Marine World just now. Oh God.
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize
