I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
Randomize
