God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
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