chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
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