people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
this boner is exhausting
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
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