Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
im going to pretend im pregnant so i can eat a lot then i will accidentally fall down the stairs
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
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