I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
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