I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
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