the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
wanna go halves on a baby?
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Randomize
