She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
Best friends brother. Beat that.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
Randomize
