she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
I’m inviting a few of my favorite manwhores to a pool party. Bring booze and wear your banana hammock so Amy can see what I’m always talking about
Randomize
