I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
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