dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
I woke up to an email from Groupon for 3 laser lipo treatments...on Valentine's Day...way to kick me when I'm down Groupon.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
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