Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
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