You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
Randomize
