This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need a burrito and a hug.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
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