Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
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