Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
Randomize
