Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
i believe in u and ur pee
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
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