I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
Randomize
