Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
