I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize
