the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
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