she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Randomize
