Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
Randomize