Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
I need you to do me a favor and hide my sword from me tonight. I'm planning on drinking my weight in vodka and I don't trust myself enough to not run through campus screaming "I AM SPARTA!" You'll be saving me a mugshot as well as saving some innocent girls from tears.
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Randomize
