drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Randomize
