Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
How I know that I'm single: when I get a save the date for a wedding & I read "& guest" my first thought was does my bottle of Jack Daniels count.
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
Randomize
