this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
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