Do vagina's smell?
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
So essentially hes paying me $150k/year for the rest of his career to not have sex
SERIOUSLY? WTF! why cant I find a super hot, super gay, super conservative christian NFL player in need of a beard?
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
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