dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
My wrist bandage is guacamole stained. What an accurate representation of my life as a whole
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
Randomize