guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
Randomize
