i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
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That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
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