I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize