The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Randomize