i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
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