I accidentally told him I've been cheating on him with his brother last night.
How did that happen by accident?
I was drunk and vomited all over him and thought, "maybe he will just stay with me out of pity if I tell him with stomach acid and alcohol all over his crotch." I was wrong.
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
Randomize
