escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
21 Porn Stars Confess What Sex Is Really Like On Set
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
Call me as soon as you're able to dial a phone. I just took a shit behind a building in broad daylight and need to get the fuck outta here soon.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
19 People That Found Pubes In All The Wrong Places
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras