I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
