White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize
