; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
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