Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
How do I put this... You're dating Ricky from Trailer Park Boys. Stop eye-fucking him and actually listen to what he says for once. He actually said "I self-learned that myself, basically" while rolling a joint. He's worse than your unskilled magician ex that accidentally cut off three of his own fingers
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
Randomize
