i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Last night i walked into a gas station to get condoms. I threw them on the counter and the guy gave me a funny look because i was wearing a bra under an open cardigan and no shoes. I screamed "DONT JUDGE ME!" and he gave them to me for free.
Randomize
