I am not drunk. I will recite the pledge.
I don't want you to recite the pledge!
Pledge alligien to america to united states of america
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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