Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
Randomize