I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
We got so high we made milksteak
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
Maybe he injected his testicle?
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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