My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
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