Midget sex pt 2 tonight
This is not my ceiling
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
Randomize
