I'd wear matching sweaters with you
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
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