i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
I love having hate sex.
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
Randomize
