Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
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