Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
I'm babysitting and we're watching Barney and I don't understand why Barney can magically make band hats appear but he makes them make shitty ass instruments.
Barney's a jerk
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
I think your dad took our porno
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
I'm always down for nudity.
Randomize